Healthy Boundaries with “friends”

 

1.  Accept people as people; as God’s creation regardless of their belief system.

2.  Listen to people in order to gather information without expressing judgmental emotions.

3.  Never place my “friends” in a belief compromising situation.

4.  I value all my “friends” and would do everything possible within my belief framework to develop a positive and mutual benefiting relationship.

5.  File or discard information that does not fit within my current life vision and goals which includes my belief system.

6.  Do not allow external forces, either people or circumstances, to dictate my actions or reactions.

7.  Be kind and gracious to all people but firm and resolute in my positions of belief.

8.  Be a person of compassion without strings or agendas attached.

9.  If I make the choice to go the extra mile then expect nothing in return.

10. Keep my word and expect others to do the same.

11. Do not use the term “friend” loosely. There are levels of trust and accountability with each term; casual acquaintance, work associate, church acquaintance, casual friend (socialize), trusted confidant (put to the test and found faithful). A person can be moved up or down the “friend” scale as the relationship develops.

12. Do not force a relationship to go to the next level up if the mutual comfort level is not there.

13. Know when necessary endings are in order and act on them in a positive manner. That is, knowing when to move a person up or down the scale so as not to be placed in a stressful, emotional situation that could turn chronic and destroy the complete relationship thereby not “living at peace with all men”.